Today's battle is to Believe. Okay every day it is to Believe but I know what God has done and I know What He Can Do. So why the burden. Why do I not celebrate His Victory. Because I can not see. I bounce from knowing to not knowing. From feeling so good about where I am to feeling like I can't ever get any better. That is a lie and each day I grow. So today I will celebrate growth. Not look back but look forward. Not doubt but Know that God's Plan is the Best and It Is Good. Not listen to but what if, not listen to people's will. Time and Time again it tells in the Bible how man tried to out think God. They tried to take the little knowledge they had and change God's plans. But our God is bigger than that and His Victory is already won. My job is to Believe, Pray, and Praise. I do Believe My God can and will protect the children and make plans for their future. Plans for good. God's Got This. Stop listening to the wrong things. Believe in good and pray.
Ephesians 6:10
Be Strong in The Lord
and in the power of His might.
11 Put on the whole armor of God,
that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.
12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood,
but against spiritual flesh and blood, but against
the rulers of the darkness of this age, against
spiritual hosts of wickness in the heavenly places
13 Therefore take up the whole armor of God,
that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.
14 Stand therefore, having girded your waist with truth, having put on the breastplate of righeousness,
15 and having the shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace;
16 above all, taking the shield of faith with which you will be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one.
17 And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God;
18 praying always with all prayer and supplication for all the saints----
19 and for me, that utterance may be given to me, that I may open my mouth boldly to make known
the mystery of the gospel,
20 for which I am an ambassador in chains; that in it I may speak boldly, as I ought to speak.
Be Prepared. You're up against far more than you can handle.
Truth, Peace, Happiness Righteousness and Salvation are more than words.
Learn How to apply them throughtout your life. God's Word is an indispensable weapon.
Pray Long and Hard. Pray for your brothers and sisters. Keep your eyes open
Keep each others spirits up so that no one falls behind or drops out.
Let my Holy Spirit guide me and not my mind. Trust in the good and doubt the bad.
God's Plan for our future He will provide all we need for every thing. Trust, Love
Thursday, March 27, 2014
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
Hebrews 12:
Let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,2 looking unto Jesus,
Nor be discouraged when you are rebuked by Him; For whom the Lord loves He chastens and scourges every son whom He receives.'
"Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless to those who have been trained by it.
12 Therefore strengthen the hands which hang down, and the feeble knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be dislocated but rather healed.
Hello My Name Is
Hello my name is regret
I'm pretty sure we have met
Every single day of your life.
I'm the whisper inside
That won't let you forget
Hello, my name is defeat
I know you recognize me
Just when you think you can win
I'll drag you right back down again
Til you've lost all belief
These are the voices, these are the lies
And I have believed them, for the very last time.
HELLO, MY NAME IS CHILD OF THE ONE TRUE KING
I'VE BEEN SAVED, I'VE BEEN CHANGED
AND I HAVE BEE SET FREE.
"AMAZING GRACE" IS THE SONG I SING
HELLO, MY NAME IS THE CHILD OF THE ONE TRUE KING
I AM NO LONGER DEFINED
BY ALL THE WRECKAGE BEHIND
THE ONE WHO MAKES ALL THINGS NEW
HAS PROVEN IT'S TRUE
JUST TAKE A LOOK AT MY LIFE
WHAT LOVE THE FATHER HAS LAVISHED UPON US
THAT WE SHOULD BE CALLED HIS CHILDREN
I AM A CHILD OF THE ONE TRUE KING
I need to remember that what others name is not who I am.
I should not let others make me feel less of a person.
I should not other define who I am but I should not limit
Who I am by Who I think I am.
Coaches are there to show you what you can do not what you think you can do.
Know who you are and be okay with that and don't let others bad day make
you doubt yourself or beat yourself up.
Nor be discouraged when you are rebuked by Him; For whom the Lord loves He chastens and scourges every son whom He receives.'
"Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless to those who have been trained by it.
12 Therefore strengthen the hands which hang down, and the feeble knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be dislocated but rather healed.
Hello My Name Is
Hello my name is regret
I'm pretty sure we have met
Every single day of your life.
I'm the whisper inside
That won't let you forget
Hello, my name is defeat
I know you recognize me
Just when you think you can win
I'll drag you right back down again
Til you've lost all belief
These are the voices, these are the lies
And I have believed them, for the very last time.
HELLO, MY NAME IS CHILD OF THE ONE TRUE KING
I'VE BEEN SAVED, I'VE BEEN CHANGED
AND I HAVE BEE SET FREE.
"AMAZING GRACE" IS THE SONG I SING
HELLO, MY NAME IS THE CHILD OF THE ONE TRUE KING
I AM NO LONGER DEFINED
BY ALL THE WRECKAGE BEHIND
THE ONE WHO MAKES ALL THINGS NEW
HAS PROVEN IT'S TRUE
JUST TAKE A LOOK AT MY LIFE
WHAT LOVE THE FATHER HAS LAVISHED UPON US
THAT WE SHOULD BE CALLED HIS CHILDREN
I AM A CHILD OF THE ONE TRUE KING
I need to remember that what others name is not who I am.
I should not let others make me feel less of a person.
I should not other define who I am but I should not limit
Who I am by Who I think I am.
Coaches are there to show you what you can do not what you think you can do.
Know who you are and be okay with that and don't let others bad day make
you doubt yourself or beat yourself up.
Tuesday, March 18, 2014
Where I am Going with My Life
Have not written in a while. Made this blog to help post meals. The meals are not going well at this time. I don't like veggie's and am getting tired of eating the same thing all the time. I have it a plattoe and have not been able to lose more weight. Trying to love who I am and stop worry about things as much. Just work out harder and learn to love foods that are good for me and stay away from foods that are bad. Getting closer to God and follow his plan for my life.
Thursday, December 19, 2013
Not Staying on Diet, Not Writing on My Blog
Okay not staying on diet. Not writing in blog. Need to do more. Why is it so hard to diet?
Why can you make yourself feel you deserve food? Eve let the devil tell her God was lying to her. She believed him and eat what she was told not to eat. Every day there is the struggle at what to eat, when to eat, and why I eat. I pray but then do I listen to God? Why is food such a struggle? Why do I feel eating badly will make me happy? Why do I keep making the same mistakes and think that things will work out differently? Okay I am staring at the screen waiting for the answer. No answer is there. When I am weak you are strong. Father God I ask you help me when I am weak. When I can't say no I give you permission to tell me no. I give you all my will power and all my love to help me pass this test. To help me get to the place where you are enough and food is not a demon following me around.
Why can you make yourself feel you deserve food? Eve let the devil tell her God was lying to her. She believed him and eat what she was told not to eat. Every day there is the struggle at what to eat, when to eat, and why I eat. I pray but then do I listen to God? Why is food such a struggle? Why do I feel eating badly will make me happy? Why do I keep making the same mistakes and think that things will work out differently? Okay I am staring at the screen waiting for the answer. No answer is there. When I am weak you are strong. Father God I ask you help me when I am weak. When I can't say no I give you permission to tell me no. I give you all my will power and all my love to help me pass this test. To help me get to the place where you are enough and food is not a demon following me around.
Thursday, December 5, 2013
Broken
Trying to help with kids and Justin. I need to give it all to God because I am sure I can't fix this.
God can and will fix any thing. No matter how much money Justin makes he is left with out any money.
He does not have insurance and bank account is in sad disrepair. No matter how much money he makes
he is spending more than that. I have done it for years. Generational curse. I ask that God bless our family with jobs, money, and teach us how to use it. I Pray that God will take us and make us strong in Him.
Tuesday, December 3, 2013
Friday, November 22, 2013
Bad Days Happen
Okay so not so proud of myself for yesterday. Day seamed to be fine. Sore from yesterday's run but okay.
I get to work out and just me and Gerald are working out. I start at my weights and I can not almost do the first one. The lightest. My head is not there. Since John told me I was never to do any movement unless it was correct and I could not do in correctly I could not get my mind right. All I could hear in my head is can't, can't' can't. I am alone and trying to pick up this weight of 65lbs 10 times. No problem I have done it for the last few weeks. I pick it up and it's not right. I put back and start over and it still fills wrong. My head is saying you can't do this. I know I can. I not only can but have for the last few weeks. There is no one there and I keep making it harder and telling myself I can't. I put on next weight of 75lb and still that thing saying you can't. Then next weight 80lb 6 times and it builds. Next weight 85lb and barely made it. and I stop and don't finish. Then I start on work out and I can't get my breath. I am pulling the tire and it is lighter than before and I still have having problems. I go to do my squats and can't get my breath. I go to do jump rope and I fail 1, 2, 3 and my legs just won't move. I finally get started and it is slow, slow,slow. I go back to pull the tire and not any easier. My stomach hurts, my abs hurt. I can not get by breath. On final round on jump ropes I start breathing hard and squeaking. Yes squeaking. I finish and Mary is talking to me and I can't breathe. I can't get any air. I put my hand on Mary and tell her I can't breathe. Now I am afraid and feeling stupid. Stupid I am afraid and I know if I stop breathing hard then I will be able to breathe but I can't get control and the more I lose control I more I am afraid. Mary has me put my arms on my head and take deep breathes. Okay if you can't breathe then how can you take deep breathes and I am sinking more and more into failure. Now I feel stupid, I can't breathe and I am trying to slow down my not breathing. I finally get to where I can breathe and the monster of mind takes over and said you are a failure and you will never be more than a failure. Okay God does not make failures. We make a choice. I am not a failure. I am a Child of God. I am loved and will be loved no matter what. I can do all things with Christ My God who strengths me. If I did not do it this time I can next time and the next and the next. I will never stop and never give up. God has a plan and it is good and I will remember and keep going. Just because I could not this time does not mean that I quit. It means I work harder and try more. If I fail it is okay and I will just keep trying.
I get to work out and just me and Gerald are working out. I start at my weights and I can not almost do the first one. The lightest. My head is not there. Since John told me I was never to do any movement unless it was correct and I could not do in correctly I could not get my mind right. All I could hear in my head is can't, can't' can't. I am alone and trying to pick up this weight of 65lbs 10 times. No problem I have done it for the last few weeks. I pick it up and it's not right. I put back and start over and it still fills wrong. My head is saying you can't do this. I know I can. I not only can but have for the last few weeks. There is no one there and I keep making it harder and telling myself I can't. I put on next weight of 75lb and still that thing saying you can't. Then next weight 80lb 6 times and it builds. Next weight 85lb and barely made it. and I stop and don't finish. Then I start on work out and I can't get my breath. I am pulling the tire and it is lighter than before and I still have having problems. I go to do my squats and can't get my breath. I go to do jump rope and I fail 1, 2, 3 and my legs just won't move. I finally get started and it is slow, slow,slow. I go back to pull the tire and not any easier. My stomach hurts, my abs hurt. I can not get by breath. On final round on jump ropes I start breathing hard and squeaking. Yes squeaking. I finish and Mary is talking to me and I can't breathe. I can't get any air. I put my hand on Mary and tell her I can't breathe. Now I am afraid and feeling stupid. Stupid I am afraid and I know if I stop breathing hard then I will be able to breathe but I can't get control and the more I lose control I more I am afraid. Mary has me put my arms on my head and take deep breathes. Okay if you can't breathe then how can you take deep breathes and I am sinking more and more into failure. Now I feel stupid, I can't breathe and I am trying to slow down my not breathing. I finally get to where I can breathe and the monster of mind takes over and said you are a failure and you will never be more than a failure. Okay God does not make failures. We make a choice. I am not a failure. I am a Child of God. I am loved and will be loved no matter what. I can do all things with Christ My God who strengths me. If I did not do it this time I can next time and the next and the next. I will never stop and never give up. God has a plan and it is good and I will remember and keep going. Just because I could not this time does not mean that I quit. It means I work harder and try more. If I fail it is okay and I will just keep trying.
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